Asylum Bradford, Co., Pa. Jan. 27, 1837.
BROTHER BEEBE: – I hope if the Lord will that we live, we shall meet next May in Philadelphia, then if we have opportunity we will look or talk over our accounts, I do not calculate on mailing you any money at present. I had rather fetch it in person, than pay the postage: If God in his providence should prevent my attending (which I hope he will not if he suffer me to live,) I shall make arrangements for sending what will be your due, soon after the meeting in May.
I really hope that it may be for the declarative glory of God, the good of Zion, your own comfort, the enlargement of your own soul and the increase of your usefulness that you have removed to Alexandria, though it may deprive me of some opportunities of meeting you, and communicating to you with my pen, I hope your paper may be filled with better productions than mine.
The divisions in the churches and the removal of some of the ministers to the westward, have greatly enlarged the sphere of my labors, and while some that are left in this region have so much other business on hand that they find but little time to preach except on Lord’s days I am travelling and preaching in my blundering way almost the whole of my time. I get but little time to read and write, and though I get but a small income, the kind Lord supports me with the little that I do get besides the rent of my small place. I think sometimes that I wish to be wholly at his disposal, I know that I am so indeed, and so is every body, and every thing else; but to believe it, to love it, be willing to have it so, realize it, and rejoice that it is so, is the fruit of his spirit alone, it never was produced by any other cause and when the principles of the flesh get the upper hand, in exercise in me, I fret and teaze, and storm and quarrel, and murmur, and complain and repine and find fault; sometimes with God, and sometimes with others, and sometimes with myself, and as I am often going astray, and wandering from the path of duty, going the things I ought not, and leaving undone the things I ought to do, I find it hard getting along unless the good shepherd gathers me with his arm, and carries me in his bosom; which I have a little hope sometimes that he does.
May the Lord give you much grace to keep you humble at his feet, and make you a polished shaft, and hide you in his quiver.
Yours in the midst of a furnace,
Supported by Israel’s God,
Signs of the Times.
Volume 5, No. 4.
February 10, 1837